Yes, I got fired at my first apprenticeship not too long ago… but let me give you some background.

Junior Professional Tennis Player

From the age of 6, it was set Tennis will be my future, ever since PE class in primary school found out I had a talent, it was non-stop playing from there. My dad became my coach, he had the same story as me, started boxing young and became pro.

So, it was me and him on court every night, through strong winds, hail and nights while it was minus degrees. I got recognised at a tournament where I was offered to move abroad and train at an American academy, half funded at the age of 10, but I rejected.

Pressure Turned Into Fear

I got put under lots of pressure to help me succeed, which worked, but not in the best way. I started to dread practice and became terrified of competing.

What if I lose? What if I play bad?

From this point on I tried to ignore it but in the back of my mind I knew I wouldn’t become pro, I lacked passion and competitiveness; I knew I was made for somewhere else.

I quickly became number 1 in Oxfordshire and has been like that for years to come, I got approached by a Junior professional coach to be trained for free at his privately owned Russian academy, which I accepted.

From this point on, fear got the best of me. There were high expectations from me as I progressed, “you’ll get in the final easy in this tournament” “you must get through to the semis today, no doubt about it”. I started shaking while playing and dreaded weekends, as if I didn’t exceed those expectations, my dad wouldn’t speak to me for days.

And fun fact I went into therapy a year back because of this.

Quit And Went Into Depression

I became top 30 in the UK at 15 and (won a national tournament where in the final I won against a girl, where right now is playing at Wimbledon and US Open on TV!). I had little to no pressure with school because my future was set to be pro, but I liked school and the feeling of success, so I tried very hard at my GCSE’s, and achieved good grades.

However, I kept getting the same injury over 3 years, and as I got older, Tennis became more serious and competitive, that’s when I knew I had to speak up.

So, after 12 years I quit.

Don’t get me wrong, this was the worst period of my life. From always getting praised from my parents and others, being showed off, and labelled the perfect daughter and talented player, I felt like such a failure.

Me and my dad didn’t have a proper conversation in months; we didn’t have anything to bond over anymore.

I felt useless. Who even am I without Tennis? I completed a Level 1 and 2 coaching course just because I couldn’t let go of that part of me. I found out this isn’t a reliable job, so my plan is to do this on the side!

But I was stuck not knowing what to do with my future.

From having a set plan from a young age, to not knowing, put me in a depression spiral for months. Due to stopping training, I didn’t know what to do with myself after college, so i started going to the gym, because I thought I was nobody without exercise.

T Level at College Uncovered My Passion!

I knew I liked business at school so I decided to do a T Level in Business Management and Administration Level 3, which without this, I wouldn’t be where I am today!

We had to complete 316 hours of relevant work experience to complete our course, which for me would have been Admin work. However, I got given Marketing work which I shouldn’t have.

But I kept quiet about it, I liked what I was doing…

That’s when I found out what I wanted to do, I knew I loved creativity and business work, which worked perfectly in the Marketing field!

Discovered Apprenticeships

I had a feeling I didn’t want to go to university, even though in college it was advertised and pushed so much. I knew about apprenticeships through my boyfriend that started one straight after school as a Gas engineer and Plumber, so I knew all the benefits of doing one. I did a little more research and then found how much an apprenticeship resonated with my future.

An apprenticeship was my route!

Applying to Apprenticeships

During college, I was applying only for degree apprenticeships, which were very competitive and would only be getting rejections. Time was flying by, and the furthest I got was 2 assessment centres for a Site Manager which I didn’t even want, as I was so desperate to get something.

I didn’t get much help at college with apprenticeships, not as much help as students applying for university. I became desperate so I decided to look into university, while looking I felt my mind and body reject the idea, so I listened and didn’t apply.

I kept applying to apprenticeships, which were lower level to be less competitive.

Then I finally completed my course achieving 3 Bs as an A Level and a Level 3 qualification in Business Management & Leadership!

Got The Job! To Getting Fired After 4 months…

After a few months, I got offered a Marketing apprenticeship near to where I live! I was debating accepting it, because I had an odd feeling… but I did, nonetheless.

I quickly realised I wasn’t hired to do marketing but do jobs they didn’t have time for. They would say they don’t have any marketing jobs yet… so why hire a marketing apprentice? I had meetings with my manager, apprenticeship manager and training provider but nothing changed.

I gave up and continued what I was doing, as I knew how competitive apprenticeships were.

Reason I got fired

Until one day, a new girl joined the team as a normal employee, who claimed to be 19. One day, me, the other apprentice and the girl decided to meet up after work, that’s when she exposed herself and our manager. Telling us they started having a sexual relationship since her first day, in our office and sometimes while we were in the building! She stated she didn’t like it but did it for his money.

Me and the other apprentice got really uncomfortable after this, and I realised I wasn’t making things up when I first started. I felt like he was being off with me too, quite flirty and a little touchy to the point I was nervous coming into the office. Until I pointed out I had a boyfriend and backed off.

We decided to inform our training provider’s safeguarding team and tutors, which were on our side, but when we told our apprenticeship manager, (as we didn’t have a HR) she pretended to be on our side but secretly would be on the manager’s team - the manager was the director of the company, so he was in charge of everyone and had lots of power.

Until one day, the other apprentice got a text from the girl saying, “I know you told your tutors everything I told you, which I said you shouldn’t”.

That’s when we knew reporting him secretly was found out, we were terrified. Soon enough we both got fired for “Breaking up work relationships”.

Offered My Current Apprenticeship!

I went back into a bad spiral after that for months, I was hopeless on what to do. I decided to apply to a retail job to gain some experience and earn money, while I apply to apprenticeships again.

After 4 months working, I quit to start my current apprenticeship, where I’m continuing my qualification from my past apprenticeship, as a Marketing Executive and a Coordinator at the London Apprenticeship Ambassador Network!

Might Have Manifested My Apprenticeship?

Now I feel like I’m dreaming. When I used to work at my past apprenticeship, every night before bed I used to watch Day in the Life’s of Marketing apprentices - which were mostly in London – just to feel content with myself that I finally got an apprenticeship, even if it wasn’t what It should have been.

The other day, I posted my first Day in the Life of a Marketing apprentice working in London. Can you believe that? I became what I used to watch for months.

It never crossed my mind I’ll end up like those videos, it was just fun to watch.

Now I’ve completed 1 month and even though I don’t know everything yet, I’m loving it, and it’s definitely an upgrade from my other one!

Patrisia Radan

Marketing Executive Apprentice | Co-ordinator at London Apprenticeship Ambassador Network

You can find out more and connect with Patrisia on LinkedIn.